Four months old.. Big boy!

Can you believe that my sweet baby Deacon is four months old already? Time has absolutely flown by, I'm amazed by how big he has gotten. Every day I feel like he gets bigger, stronger, more alert, smiles bigger and more often, and the boy talks more than I do! A year ago today I had no idea that I was even pregnant, and now I can't imagine my life without Deacon Scott Hensley. He's the light of my life and the best part of every day :)


Willow, my other baby, has an ear infection- poor thing! Right after I had Deacon I noticed that she was scratching her ears a lot and wimpering, but I was so consumed with getting the little man out and into my arms that I just pushed the issue to the side. Oops. When I got back from the hospital and picked her up I could smell the infection in her ears, and Scott had to take her to the vet to get antibiotics and cleaning solution. I felt like such a bad Mama! I've tried to pay attention since then because our vet said that she is prone to ear infections, but this one just snuck up on me yesterday. Scott took her to the dog park on Thursday and she came home a MESS so I gave her a bath and cleaned out her ears afterward. I don't know if she got water in them or if it's just from the weather change, but when we got home from the grocery store yesterday afternoon I smelled that same odor again and knew what had happened. I scooped her up and sure enough her left ear was oozing (gross!) so I gave her Benadryl and have started the antibiotic drops again. Poor baby Willow! I know it hurts her and she hates me messing with her ears, but she's such a gentle soul that she just tucks her tail between her legs, hangs her head, and curls up in a ball while I doctor her. The Benadryl is a different story, however, you should've seen Scott and I try to get her to take the liquid yesterday! It's been so long since I've had to give it to her that I forgot that she will only take the pill. Willow has allergies and when the grass is mowed or she gets irritated by the pollen I have to give her Benadryl, but since it's winter it's been a while. I tried getting her to take it out of the cup- nope. Then I tried putting it on a piece of pepperoni- yeah right. I put it in some milk- forget it. Scott even held her and I tried to pour it down her throat- no such luck. At that point Willow was DONE and hid under the table like she was in trouble- and then I remembered the tablets. Haha! She's feeling much better now, but it was quite an ordeal.


Yesterday we went to Target to do some shopping and Scott saw this giraffe and fell in love. Apparently it brought back some suppressed childhood memory of a dinosaur he had that wound up and sung the "lullaby and goodnight" song. Haha. Of course he gave it to Deacon who grew just as attached and before I knew it Deacon was crying when we tried to take it away! Naturally we ended up bringing it home with us because Scott and I are both big softies and Deacon has us wrapped around his chubby little finger. We're so doomed! I told Scott that we're going to have to stop handing him things or we'll end up broke and with the kid who has to sleep with 45 stuffed animals because they're ALL special! Haha.


TWELVE days until Deacon and I go to North Carolina to see my family! I absolutely can't wait, I've been so homesick lately. It's funny how I used to only go back once or twice a year and even then I would hardly be at the house- but now I go a month without seeing them and I'm in tears. It's ridiculous how much has changed in the past year, but I wouldn't have it any other way! Angela sent me this picture of the ducks yesterday, they ordered 11 and 2 will be yellow and fluffy like this! I've already named one Gus, we'll see which lucky little ducky gets the name- I'm sure it will be the first one Max gets though, that's usually how things work out for me!


I've seen three Miller Lite commercials today, and can I just say that they are HILARIOUS! "If your Miller Lite and I were hanging off a cliff and you could only save one, which would you choose? -Uh, how high is the cliff?" "I want to tell you something. I love you. -Uh, I loooo... I luve. - Would you like another Miller Lite? -Oh I'd LOVE one!" And my personal favorite. "What do you love about the new Miller Lite bottles? (Lists a handful of very detailed features) OK, now what do you love about me? -Uh, I love what you're doing with this thing right here. And I love your teeth. What do you love about me? -You're my soul mate. - Ditto." HAHAHA! Gets me every time!


Ok so this has been my battle of the week. Friday was my friend Candice's birthday and I got invited to go to Blackfinn with her and some of our other friends to celebrate with her. What's the big deal, right? Here's the thing... I haven't seen Candice since last June along with everyone else who would be there. When I was an Alpha Chi, Candice was my grand-big and the person that got me into the whole sorority scene. We were really good friends and she became one of the few people that I confided in and trusted with my personal life- but when I got pregnant she disappeared with everyone else, and didn't show up to my baby shower. Granted neither did anyone else, but Candice lied to me about it. When I was on my way to the shower she texted me and said that she was sick and couldn't come, and later that day I saw on Facebook that she was going to a party in Dallas- one that she later posted pictures of. I called her out on it and she apologized for lying, but since then she has avoided me. Because I was never actually initiated I am not officially her grand-little, but a few weeks ago she invited me to be a part of her facebook family and I was told that that was kind of her way of making amends with me. Several posts ago I mentioned my friend Sam, she too was part of our family, and she told me that Candice had told her how badly she felt for abandoning me and how she treated me with the baby shower situation. Even though I knew that it would be an awkward evening, I decided to go to her dinner anyway in hopes that maybe she and I could make up the way Sam and I had. All day on Friday I was SO nervous, and when it came time for me to get dressed and ready I literally felt like I was going to throw up! I really can't pinpoint any specific reason why, maybe because there would be other girls there who had abandoned me and talked about me behind my back, or because it was the first time since I had Deacon that I was going out on my own, or maybe because I was self-conscience about my post-baby appearance. No clue! But I walked out of the house looking nice and got lots of compliments throughout the night (which made me feel good!) and the person I was most nervous about seeing didn't even show up. When I walked in everyone was nice and said hi, but I could tell that they didn't think I would actually show up. Candice was really happy to see me and tried to include me as much as she could in conversations, but the others weren't quite as welcoming so a good deal of the night was awkward and I'm sure the new girls who don't know me have a very cold perception of me. Thank goodness my friend Jordan showed up, she and I have become friends because we both have puppies and don't have a pre-Deacon history, so it was good to talk to her. Scott called me right as dinner was being brought out and Deacon had woken up unexpectedly and wouldn't calm down. I could hear him in the background and it was the "Dad, WHERE is Mom?!" cry, so I left money, gave someone else my drink, and went home. Thank you Deacon! :) It's just not the same anymore and no matter how much I want to I don't fit with that crowd like I used to. Candice told me she missed me and I truly think it would be different if she and I would hang out one on one and talk, but as far as making that crowd my girls night it's just not going to happen. It hurts, but I think I needed that night to finally turn that page in my life and move on from that group of friends. My big Vanessa, one of the first people I told about my pregnancy, someone I considered one of my closest friends couldn't even hold a conversation with me. I thought that of all people she would be one that would keep in contact with me, but she still has my Mother's Day card from last year- that's how long it's been since I've seen her. So I come away from this weekend bruised but not beaten down, and very ready to move on. I wouldn't change anything about my life, and I need to keep moving forward rather than leaving one foot stuck in the past.


I know this post was very random and I was all over the map, sorry about that! On a final note, Scott, Deacon, Willow, and I would like to wish Reese and Joey a very happy birthday! They both turned three yesterday, and we hope their day was extra special :)